14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship

14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship

14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship

While this is normal in a relationship, power struggles are not healthy.

As your relationship develops and you get older, you will likely find yourself part of a power struggle with your partner. This is when you struggle to maintain a happy and harmonious relationship while maintaining a sense of identity and independence. Arguments that stem from things like overspending at Ikea or not offering to help clean the house are signs of a power struggle. This is because although they are a team, neither side wants to ask questions or be told what to do.

Couples involved in a power struggle usually fight more and there is an overall feeling of unhappiness in the relationship. Sadly, many couples are unable to resolve these issues and end up breaking up.

Before taking this extreme step, this is all you need to do to resolve this conflict. You also need to find out if the problems you are facing are deeper than you might initially imagine. You may be dealing with issues that are much bigger than a power struggle, but once you resolve them, you will be able to maintain a healthy relationship.

14 tips to overcome power struggles in a relationship

If you’re stuck and have no idea where to start, here are 14 ways to overcome power struggles in your relationship. Although these steps are easy, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t try your best.

#1 Set new goals

14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship
14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship

When both sides have nothing new to work on, what are they trying to pick on each other to “improve”? things. That’s when the conflict occurs. Once you set new goals and work towards them together, you will realize that all the little things are an integral part of the relationship and that there are bigger things to take care of.

#2 Stop manipulating each other

14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship
14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship

Another way to overcome a power struggle in a relationship is to stop manipulating each other. You are a team and must function as such. You should also realize that there is no right or wrong when trying to make things work. No need to compete, no need for each other, and certainly no need to resort to lies.

#3 Communicate often

14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship
14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship

If your partner does something that upsets you, don’t resort to yelling. Be calm about it and communicate like an adult. For example, if your husband locked up your teenage daughter for breaking curfew when you specifically said she should be grounded, don’t argue with each other. Leave it alone and talk about working as a team, not as individuals.

#4 Make the rules and roles clear

The best way to end a power struggle in a relationship is to be clear about who does what. This way, there will be little room for arguments and both sides will have tasks to focus on without having to invade each other’s territory or jobs. Be sure to stick with it and don’t fester because then you’ll go back to your old ways of conflicting and arguing with each other.

For example, Andrea will cook and clean, and Tommy will be in charge of carpooling the children and buying groceries. Sure, they can help each other, but under no circumstances should one side try to hijack and control the other.

#5 Observe other couples

14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship
14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship

The only way to learn is to watch other couples to see that they have it all figured out. Don’t be shy to ask them for tips. I’m sure others aren’t perfect, but it doesn’t hurt to learn a thing or two from them. It can provide you with a way to deal with your unique power struggle.

#6 Seek professional help

14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship
14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship

Don’t be afraid to seek professional help as these individuals are specially trained to help couples resolve similar issues. Counselors and therapists are a goldmine of tips and tricks, and seeing them will make your relationship look great. Additionally, it is good to have an impartial third party to act as a referee.

#7 Take some time off

Perhaps one of the reasons why you are in a constant struggle for power is the extreme stress of everyday life. Children, jobs, mortgages and everything else takes a toll on even the strongest of relationships. If you can handle it, go with your partner in a whole new way to take your mind off the real world. Focus on each other and learn to communicate again. Think of it as couples therapy without the therapist.

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#8 Take inventory of your life

Take time to think about where you are in life. Did you accomplish what you set out to do? Are you satisfied with the life you have built together? what else do you want to do Ask yourself these questions, take a step back and look at the bigger picture. Once you reassess your life, you will likely discover the reasons for your constant power struggle with your partner. Address these issues and make a conscious effort to resolve them.

#9 Do new things together

As mentioned above, power struggles usually develop over time. It could be that both parties focus on different things on a daily basis. For example, you both have different jobs that take up your time and energy and at the end of the day you don’t have time for each other. Everything from signing up for salsa classes to cooking twice a week will get the two of you on the same page and give you a chance to reconnect.

 14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship 14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship

#10 Understand that you are a team

You are not playing against each other. Everything you do should be for the benefit of the relationship. Sure, there are things you can enjoy without your partner, like fishing with the boys or getting your nails done with the girls; But at the end of the day, your routine must reflect your ability to function as a team.

#11 Don’t expect anything

Expecting something, whether from yourself or your partner, is a direct path to despair. Set goals instead of expectations and work closely with them.

#12 Let things flow

You have to learn to let things flow. Don’t hold grudges or bring up the past. Learn to forgive and learn from your struggles and mistakes.

#13 Shut up

You should know by now that speaking your mind in the heat of the moment does nothing but harm. Remember that you are not a teenager, so there is no need to spew hurtful words at your partner. If you feel like you’re about to explode, leave the situation. Take a walk to another part of the house and think for yourself before calmly solving the problem.

#14 Rediscovering each other

Remind yourself why you fell in love in the first place. Think about what it was like when you first got together before career, before home, before kids. Go back to the days when it was just the two of you and appreciate the fact that you made it this far. Once you get the hang of things, things like power struggles will seem silly in comparison.

14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship    14 Ways to End the Power Struggle in a Relationship
Muddasir Harry

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